We've all heard the term T.H.O.T., an acronym meaning, "Thirsty Hoes Over There". The term is degrading and misogynistic at best. Aimed primarily at females, this saying, which is splattered all over social media pages, devalues and dehumanizes women and calls the very essence of our being into question. It reduces our God-given sexuality to something that can be trivialized, commercialized and sold for some shoes, a designer purse or a new outfit.
Sadly, it is a truth that is as old as civilization itself. It is not a 21st first century thing, a race thing, an ethnic thing or even an economic thing. Even more indicting is the fact that T.H.O.T.'s are not just women. A fifteen minute perusal of news headlines reveals a society filled with women and men immersed in a culture that is sexually confused and morally bankrupt with no appetite for truth. Yet, it is thirsty.
The reality is that while we are not all "hoes" in the sexual sense of the word, we as human beings are all "thirsty" for something. We are thirsty for love, acceptance, affirmation and security. We thirst to be wanted, needed and appreciated. We thirst to feel complete. And many times, we take this thirst and try to quench it with things of this world. We "whore" after idol gods--money, status, titles, jobs, cars, houses--all of which leave us more thirsty than before. Even those of us in church substitute tradition for truth. We attend church out of habit and leave Sunday worship just as thirsty and empty as when we walked in the door.
We are all in some sense, T.H.O.T.S.
The woman we find in John 4's gospel knew exactly what it meant to be thirsty. Four husbands and a live in boyfriend into this thing called life, she knew that something was missing. Filled with shame and shunned by the other women in her village, she went to the well at the hottest part of the day. She couldn't take another whisper or side-eye. Not another murmur or insult under the breath. She would rather take her thirst to the well at high noon than to feel the condemnation and shame that shrouded her life.
Expecting to be alone, imagine her surprise to find a hot, tired and very thirsty Jesus sitting at the well with no bucket--not even a ladle--with which to get water. She had the bucket, but no water. He had all of the water she needed, but nothing to draw with. And so, Jesus asks for a drink.
The request was direct. And very unorthodox. Here was a man alone conversing with her, and a Jewish man at that. Yet, his very voice stirred something inside her that had never been touched before. Nevertheless, she didn't have time for it. She was not going to allow another man to use her. Best to cut this off before it goes too far.
And so, the Samaritan woman made it a race thing informing Jesus (as if he didn't already know), "You Jews have no dealings with Samaritans". When that didn't dissuade Jesus's request, she made it an ethnic/heritage thing asking, "Are you greater than our father Jacob who drank from this well?"
Then Jesus got personal. He asked her to go get her husband. He got in her business. He got to the heart of her thirst, and it touched a nerve. He was good, she'd give him that. But prophet or not, he needed to know that she knew tradition and the law concerning worship.
Finally, she made it a church thing, declaring, "Our fathers worshiped on this mountain, and you Jews say that in Jerusalem is the place where one ought to worship." (You know, the whole, "We're Holy Baptist Church #1; you're Holy Baptist Church #3" type thing). Then he spoke of something she'd never heard before--spirit and truth. True worship. Real relationship.
Not the on again, off again type of relationships she'd had with the men in her past. Not the judgemental, smile in your face and stab you in the back type of friendships she'd experienced with other women. But a real, authentic, spiritual relationship. One that would never leave her looking for affirmation outside of herself ever again. A relationship that knew all of her mess--all of her sin and issues and hang-ups--and still wanted to be there.
This type of relationship can only be found with Jesus. Jesus has all of the water I'll ever need. His is a water of love, acceptance, security. It is a water that will fill me up with joy despite life's circumstances and will wash away my sin and shame from my past choices and mistakes.
This is the only relationship that I know I can never mess up because it is not dependent on me.
As wonderful as my husband is, I know that there will come a time when life's journey will end and we will leave one another. But the love that Jesus offers carries me from here into eternity. And so, I, like the woman at the well, invite you to come see a man who told me everything about myself.
And yet he still invited me to drink.
Until the Divas meet again,
Jabaria
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